gettin on my nerves

how can you suddenly, sporadically forget which toothbrush is yours? i've made sure to get you a white one each time we've replaced them for the last 9 months! why would you decide today to use the purple one?

why is it whenever i check on the baby, everything's fine, but when you do, you wake her? every.time.

it's a queen size bed. seriously, there's room for us both. scoot the hell over.

then, after you roll over pouting and whimpering like a puppy dog, reach one foot back over and lace it between mine.